What Is

Whenever

Flights of fancy 

Take me too far,

I remind myself:

Be here and now,

And enjoy what is

Because

You are not mine

And I'm not yours;

Our reasons differ,

But in the end,

This is what is

Everything..

Conversations about everything...

Acceptance despite everything...

Honesty in everything...

I would have given

Everything you promised me...

Everything I believed you to be...

If you had given...

A Greeting

Some goodbyes we said

Under lockdown, will remain.

But I wish you well.

A Question

Can he feel my pain, as I feel his...

Or am I just imagining this...

Does he perhaps not care at all,

Is it all just an act? While I fall...

And stumble through this quagmire

Of emotions and confused desire...

Or does he perhaps feel too much

More than he can bear to touch

Unprotected; and only dares gaze

From behind the translucent haze,

Drowning out his pain, and mine;

Drowning without his pain, and mine...?

Accepting Acceptance

Despair so pointless
Frustration moot
Things simply are
Not bad or good

Perception is all
Real in your head
Change if you can
All else accept

Thoughts not new
I am as wise
Accepting acceptance
I realise

What They Say

They say that I am warm and kind.
They say that I am harsh.
They say that I am silly.
They say that I am smart.
They say that I am logical.
They say that I am nuts.
They say that I should lighten up.
They say I make them laugh.

They say that I am real mature.
They say that I'm a child.
They say that I am innocent;
They say that I am wild.
They say that I am much too frank.
They like my honesty.
They say that I'm a dreamer.
They say I don't believe.

They say I argue way too much.
They say I listen well.
They say that I am tolerant.
They say I'm judgemental.
They say I'm enigmatic.
They say I'm an oddity.
*I* say that I'm undefined.
I say that I am *me*.

Again

Each time I finally dare believe
This time, with me, he'll stay,
He breaks my fractured heart again
And simply walks away...
And every time I think I'm fine,
"I'm used to this, it's no big deal",
I realise that I'm not(!) fine;
I'm broken; I'll need time to heal...
And then I wonder why did I
Allow myself to hope again
When everything he's ever said
Has always proved to be in vain!